“Whoever is present are the right people. Whenever it begins is the right time. Whatever happens is the only thing that could have happened. And when it’s over, it’s over.”-Anne Lamott from Some Assembly Required articulating the Four Immutable Laws of the Spirit
Just like teaching, what you’ve planned for professional development is often different from what actually transpires. I’ve found these four laws center me on a healthy perspective.
Whoever is present are the right people
Twelve people signed up for your class and thirty show up. Twenty people were scheduled to attend your course during a busy week; three arrive and look at you expectantly. Instead of spending my time with, “But I thought…” or “I’ve only prepared for…” I’ve started repeating “whoever is present are the right people” and modifying the presentation in the moment.
I work with my share of unique participants. One dominates conversations, two bring the newspaper to read and three burst into laughter at pictures of their dressed-up dogs (true stories all). By sticking to the mantra “these are the right people,” I continue to build relationships with my participants while holding clear boundaries. A timed structure helps the conversation dominator, getting up and moving encourages the newspaper aficionados to set the paper down and smiling at the dog viewers redirects their attention.
Whenever it begins is the right time
Of the four mantras, I’m least flexible about starting “whenever.” If I posted the class as starting at 3:45, I start at 3:45. In unusual circumstances due to location confusion or parking, I’ll give a buffer, but I believe in honoring the participants who show up on time. I think about “whenever it begins is the right time” more in regard to pacing. If I planned fifteen minutes for a discussion on assessment, but participants are proactively tackling some big ideas in their practice, I make room in my pacing. That may mean we start the independent reading ten minutes later, but I trust that must’ve been the right time.
Whatever happens is the only thing that could have happened
Recently at a workshop with about forty educators, my co-facilitator and I gave specific directions for a pause-paraphrase-probe activity that rotated at three- and seven-minute intervals for thirty minutes. Three triads chose to move off to a quieter space and didn’t return until long after the activity had stopped. One of the participants apologized to me during the break, “We got into our coaching conversations and completely lost track of time.” I said, “Then that must’ve been exactly what you needed” and I meant it.
And when it’s over, it’s over
My friend Arthur reminds me that when you really live, success and failure come and go. Sometimes I think a presentation hasn’t gone well because the audience was so reserved, but then I read the thoughtful exit slips and realize they were processing deeply. Other times I recognize where we got off track or how one activity didn’t work. I make notes on my pacing guide immediately so I’ll remember for next time. “This took 20 minutes not 10” and “Be sure to count off for this activity” are helpful tips for the next time. It’s good to reflect after, but ultimately when I’ve cleaned up my space and turned off the lights, I remind myself I did my best and “when it’s over, it’s over.”